Save Your Marriage in a Culture of Disposable Relationships

Do you know how to save your marriage in a culture that does not value relationships?

I remember when marriage was considered a sacred commitment. My parents’ generation had even more respect for marriage. To them it was a once in a lifetime commitment. The family unit was the strength of our society based on our ability to commit to each other as responsible dedicated couples. Most children had both a mother and a father as role models to follow in achieving the great American dream.

In today’s society marriage appears to be a secondary afterthought. The family unit is weakened by a divorce rate that is over 50%. Even our government seems to be working against saving your marriage by allowing no fault divorce. No reason is needed for a divorce except that one partner just wants out. If your relationship is in trouble, how are you expected to save it in this atmosphere?

First, remember that you can save your marriage, even if you are the only one that does not want to give up on the relationship. It will take a lot of work on your part but you can do it. Be prepared to do the bulk of the work. Know right from the beginning that you will have to make a very large effort to succeed.

OK so you are the one that wants to save your marriage. You will need a plan. Let’s take a look at some of the necessary steps for you to use to save your marriage.

1.) Revaluate the concerns that you and your spouse had that lead to a divorce being considered. Address these concerns. Look at them from your spouses position not just your own. Try to reach a mutual understanding that will allow you to compromise and resolve the issues that created these concerns.

2.) You and your spouse have a considerable investment in your relationship. This is a building block to save your marriage. With this in mind, use this investment as leverage so if your partner wants to leave they realize they have every reason not too. Use the good times you have had to keep things together.

3.) Do not be the one to argue all the reasons you need to stay together. If you badger your spouse any progress you were making could be canceled out. Take a mature stand against divorce but give your partner enough space so they can see the good in your relationship on their own.

4.) Be particularly aware of staying positive in your communication with each other. No one is perfect and now is not a good time to point out each others faults. Learn to live with them.

5.) Try not to be overbearing. Take a stand that you do not want the divorce and you do want to save your marriage, but keep the process in a positive light. The last thing you want to do is add fuel to the fire if it is your partner that wants the divorce. Try to do things that you can enjoy together. Show your spouse that you are serious about wanting to save your marriage and you can change as needed to do so. If you can do this, then things should start to fall in place for reconciliation.

Yes we do live in a culture of disposable relationships. Trying to save your marriage may not be the popular thing to do. However, you know in your heart of hearts that your marital relationship is the most important bond in your life. Save your marriage, it is well worth all of your effort.

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